i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize