Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
