How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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