why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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