taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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