she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
