Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I licked your asshole in confidence.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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