He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
So squirting runs in the family.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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