umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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