i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
