This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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