i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
