Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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