Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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