True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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