Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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