Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize