According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
love makes seman taste better
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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