I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
