There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize