PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I said "one day" and that day is not today
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
