i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
