Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
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