we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
how does that bad decision feel?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
