im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You may now shotgun with the bride
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Randomize