the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize