you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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