I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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