a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
The power of my boobs compel you
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.