I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.