2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year