Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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