Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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