i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Randomize