She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
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I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
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Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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