Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
operation harelip BJ is a go
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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