it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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