We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
honey bunches of taint.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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