it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
