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• (703): View more from Virginia

  the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  her facebook's as public as her vagina

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• (210): View more from Texas

  Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  It was like giving head to a cactus.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  will a lunchtime blow job make it better?

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one

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