Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
