Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
