I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
