I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
