Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
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