The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
