She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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