woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
