yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
