Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be your penis for a week.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize