Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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