i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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