she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
