hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He? As in you personified your dick?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
